Meet The Real Simon Harris – The Dishonourable Duke Of Duping

Is it not reprehensible – the height of hypocrisy in fact – that Simon Harris the leader of the Irish Government  – has the audacity to accuse Sinn Féin in recent weeks of ‘duping’ people when it expelled several party members for substandard social behaviour?

Simon Harris – the Dishonourable Duke of Duping.

The Cambridge dictionary definition of dupe is ‘to deceive’ and if anyone is guilty of deception, it is Harris and his colleagues in the coalition Government of Fine Gael, Fianna Fail and the Green Party.

Over the last four years since being in power – and for many years before that – these parties have been nothing less than ‘repeat offenders,’ constantly deceiving the ordinary hardworking people of Ireland with false promises of a quality lifestyle as befitting a nation that is one of the earliest members of the European Union, then called the European Economic Community, or EEC for short, back in 1973.

Instead, however, we have one of the most disastrous health systems on the continent, with people waiting years for life-saving surgeries, often dying before they receive it; we are awash in homelessness and poverty, with an estimated people 30,000 living on the streets, including thousands of young children and infants; we have a forsaken, forgotten, forlorn State where retirees and newlyweds alike are unable to afford the rent of a simple home, never mind the financial resources to even remotely consider buying one to end or begin their lives together in a modicum of comfort.

Not only does the Dishonourable Duke of Duping continue to deceive people that after all these years he’ll one day consider putting a roof over our heads, but he himself basks in the lap of luxury in one of the most expensive and elitist places in Ireland, the scenic coastal town of Greystones in county Wicklow, where he was born, where he lives and where houses cost up to two million euro, and more.

But is it not somewhat harsh of us to criticise the Dishonourable Duke of Duping for his lack of common decency? Is it not unfair to ask a man of such Royal blood living in such a high falutin’ environment to understand the plight of so many desperate Irish people? Is that not akin to asking King Charles of England to make his own cupán tae once in a while?

Shamefully, while the wealthy in Ireland (many of whom are the Dishonourable Duke of Duping’s closest neighbours) while away their days in decadent lifestyles with fancy homes in fancy places or travel in  environmentally-damaging private jets (which the Dishonourable Duke of Duping does frequently) and indulge their whims in ostentatious holiday homes abroad (which the Dishonourable Duke of Duping often does), modern Ireland suffers the worst housing shortage in its entire 100-year history. 

Studies show less than a third of 30-year-olds own their home. Over half of all newly-built homes in greater Dublin alone were bought or developed by global vulture investor funds, thus locking countless people out of ever attempting to buy one. These ‘vampire funds’ don’t buy homes to sell, they buy them to extract high rents in perpetuity. In other words, they suck the lifeblood out of decent Irish society.

And to make matters worse, the Dishonourable Duke of Duping and his cadre of Government lackeys allowed a temporary no-fault eviction ban in Ireland to lapse last March, thus opening the floodgates for more than 15,000 notices of termination to be issued last year, making the number of evictions higher than it was during the Famine in the mid-1800s. 

For centuries, gutless, greedy, often absentee, landlords, have been the scourge of Ireland, rich, ruthless people who with the click of a finger, a scribbled signature on a sheet of paper, thoughtlessly tossed hungry families out into the ditches. 

Now it seems the same is happening all over again in modern Ireland, this time under the dictatorial rule of the Dishonourable Duke of Duping and his ignoble entourage.

Instead of urgently dealing with these major social and health issues that are making the lives of so many Irish people intolerable, Harris and his well-to-do cohorts, including Government coalition leaders, Micheál Martin of Fianna Fail and Roderic O’Gorman of the Green Party, are pointing their grubby finger at Sinn Féin, an oft-used political ploy to distract popular attention away from the real issues, and their own failings on them. 

In doing so, however, these ‘I’m-better-than-you’ leaders fail to realise something important. While the bitter winds of winter howl at our doors, while Storm Ashley batters the coast this weekend, Irish people are not bears. They are not hibernating. They are wide awake. And fearful. And hungry. And cold. And they remember the empty promises made to them from on high four years ago, and for many years before that.  

Maybe, just maybe, we should ask Sinn Féin leader Mary Lou McDonald to re-tell the story of these empty promises once more, to remind us how easily we were taken for fools. And in doing so, help us make sure the Dishonourable Duke of Duping and his Royal patrons don’t sneak back into power through the back door and make jesters of us for another four years in their Court of Failure.

Maybe, just maybe, we’ve learned our lesson and are wide awake enough to elect Sinn Féin, the ‘Party of Change’ and improve things for the better. For each and everyone of us, our parents, our children and the generations who come after. 

My predictions: Irish election Saturday

My observations of us Irish since returning to live in my native country 10 years ago is that far from the reputation we have in the eyes of other nationalities as an almost swashbuckling tribe of adventurers, we are in fact the most boring, banal and predictable of people when it comes to voting habits.

We, sheep-like, have voted into government mainly one of only two parties since the nation was founded a century ago, our warped sense of ‘change’ being simply to switch from Fianna Fail to Fine Gael and vice-versa now and then.

In doing so, we fail to realize – or worse, realize but lack the courage to accept – that there is simply no difference between these two parties.

What greater evidence do we need of this, if we needed more, than the last five years of Government: these two parties having been in what is strangely termed a ‘confidence and supply’ relationship. In effect, a coalition government under a different guise.

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My advice: take a chance on change. It’s long past time and no less than what you deserve.

Consequently, shocking ongoing crises in key sectors such as health, housing and social welfare have occurred under the watch of both parties. They are both equally guilty of neglect and disservice to the people of Ireland. And Fianna Fail bankrupted Ireland not so long ago, leaving teachers, nurses and others on the scrap heap, and some of its TDs then are running again, including its leader.

So, on voting day tomorrow (Saturday), will the final outcome be any different from that over the last 100 years?

Sadly, regardless of Sinn Fein receiving a well-deserved boost, hopefully above the 30 mark,  I don’t think so.

If past result are anything to go by, we will remain with a Centre Right majority that kowtows to wealthy individuals, major corporations, banks, vulture funds and major land developers offering tax breaks and other incentives. A coalition that steadfastly fails to rectify the growing, severe inequalities in social life here.

Through the election campaign, I continue to be deeply disillusioned by the media in Ireland and their bias. For example, do many people really believe there was a dead-heat between Fianna Fail and Sinn Fein, 24-24 percent, in the Red C poll for the Business Post? What decent, well-organized poll ends up in a draw? It is not even mathematically possible as you poll an odd number of people, not an even number, to make sure there is an outright winner.

A caveat to this is that my wife, Columbia from Romania, who will, I believe like many emigrants, vote Sinn Fein, received a call from Red C. But when she said she lived in Donegal, they refused to take her details, telling her they had enough people from Donegal.

Surprising to say the least, as Red C had boasted its poll was a ‘random’ one. This simple incident proves it was far, far from that. It is no coincidence that, with Sinn Fein poised through Pearse Doherty and Pádraig Mac Lochlainn to attract more votes than any other party in Donegal, Red C pollsters were told not to take anyone from Donegal in the so-called ‘random’ poll.

I feel Sinn Fein was probably the winner in that poll but a national business newspaper handing this particular party the lead in such a crucial election would have been tantamount to treachery in the eyes of the newspaper’s owners and its well-to-do readers.

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Let a woman take the lead. (image from first-ever Irish elections)

Or take The Irish Times, for whom I worked as a foreign correspondent. At least, they had the decency to portray their poll results honestly. Sinn Fein as outright winners.

But then a strange thing happened, the newspaper started spinning the numbers in an effort to reduce the prestigious victory of Sinn Fein, mixing in other numbers to the point of confusion.

There was even a bizarre moment during its live election debate from Trinity College earlier this week for subscribers when event host, Hugh Linehan, the newspaper’s arts and culture editor, said the poll might have created ‘a self-fulfilling prophecy’ and encouraged other journalistic colleagues on the panel to agree with him, which political correspondent, Pat Leahy (formerly of the Business Post) gleefully did.

How can a poll be ‘a self-fulfilling prophecy’? It’s as if a poll is an unseen power outside in the ether controlling the minds of people. Simply ludicrous. A completely irrational attempt at spin.

Keep in mind also that election podcasts by The Irish Times since the campaign began featured four men in key intro voiceover sound-bites, Fine Gael’s Leo Varadkar and Fianna Fail’s Micheal Martin, another Fine Gaeler and an Independent. No mention of Sinn Fein’s Mary Lou McDonald, who won the newspaper’s own poll as most popular person for Taoiseach and Sinn Fein as most popular party.

Not until I pointed this out to the newspaper in several e-mails did they decide to include Mary Lou’s voice.

Beware of Subliminal Election Messages

PREDICTIONS

My predictions for the five-seater in Donegal where I live: two Sinn Fein, one Fine Gael, one Fianna Fail and one Independent.

Pearse Doherty and Pádraig Mac Lochlainn of Sinn Fein and Joe McHugh of Fine Gael will be the first past the post.

Then there’ll be a battle for the last two seats with Fianna Fail’s Charlie McConalogue sweating it out next to get over the line.

Then the Battle Royale for the final seat – between Fianna Fail’s Pat the Cope Gallagher and hard-working Independent, Thomas Pringle.

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It’ll be a rainy day for some candidates.

It’s past time multi-pensioned Pat, and his brand of old-style politics, retired from the ring. While once a shoo-in, he’s now panic canvassing door-to-door, but I’m hoping Pringle, younger, more progressive, more passionate, will receive his just reward.

Whether you agree with me or not, don’t waste your right to express your opinion. Call me a dreamer, but I still believe voting has as much meaning as we give it, so use it.

Perhaps this will turn out to be ‘the election of the young,’ the one that changes the usual political landscape of Ireland.